To value yourself is critical. It affects your perception of you and your life. Whether or not you value yourself will affect your friendships and relationships either positively or negatively. The question then becomes, what does it mean to value yourself? Below, I share what I’ve learned/learning through my journey on self -love about what valuing myself means.
The Company You Keep Means Something to You
When you value yourself, the people you surround yourself with mean something to you. These people add something that is positive, uplifting and worthwhile to your life. In the past, I would simply allow anyone in to fill space. This means that I had some friendships that didn’t matter to me. I dated someone that I didn’t really like. I would cling to whatever I could have access to.
As I started valuing myself, things changed. I don’t surround myself with toxic and negative people. This is important to me because I am a dreamer. I have goals. If someone around me is bringing me down, it affects how I function. So whenever I notice that I’m around someone like that, I know to distance myself. I’ve done that. I don’t need just any company. I want to be around those that matter to me and have good and supportive energy. I want to be around those that I value, admire and respect.
You Make Time to Create Your Happiness
Valuing yourself means making time for your joy. It’s knowing that life is meant to be enjoyed. I used to be dependent on others for happiness and it wasn’t worth it because it still didn’t make me happy. Now, I know I can’t wait around. I know what brings me joy so I make time for such things.
Too often, we sit around and wait for others to validate us. To make us happy. To give us an experience. Yet, we’re the ones leading our lives. If you’re not sure how to go about getting your joy, check out my post on 4 Ways to Create a Happier Life.
Celebrate All Your Efforts
People have said they see something in me and for a while, I didn’t know what that was. I remember in highschool, my English teacher would leave post-it notes telling me to believe in myself and my voice. She could tell that my self-esteem was weak. The things I can now say I’m proud off didn’t mean much to me in the past.
I wouldn’t celebrate my efforts, my little accomplishments because I was always focused on what’s next or comparing myself to someone that did more or has more and better. Now, I have moments where I force myself to be still. To not be entirely consumed by future goals and recognize and commend myself for the efforts I make right now. This helps me and could help you to take some pressure off yourself. If you succeed at a goal or if you fail, celebrate the effort. Enjoy the process of trying.